Twitter is dead, X is a cesspit, let's make 2025 the year of the message board

Twitter is dead. Almost exactly a year ago I hoped the once-upon-a-time microblog of record would have a 2024 bad enough to kill it—to finally free me from my compulsion to check in—and you know what? The year made good on my request.

Don't get me wrong. I don't mean that Twitter is dead in the sense that it doesn't continue to draw in, somehow, millions of users, or that it doesn't continue to generate some small sliver of revenue from the dullest wits on Earth forking over $8 a month to...