Dark day for humanity as Gex Trilogy achieves 'huge success,' patches in its cursed EU voices from Red Dwarf's Cat and the 'Ding dong' guy

Reader, I hoped I'd never have to write these words. I hoped you'd never have to read them. But it falls to me to report that, in a clear violation of mankind's covenant with god, Limited Run Games' remastered Gex Trilogy has apparently attained "huge success."

I kid. Well, kind of. The Gex games were never good, but they make up one of those series that has, over the years, entered a level of meme-ified denigration that no game truly deserves outside of, like, Blackwater or something. A bit like Bubsy.