Wake up! These spider-looking phenomena just spotted on Mars are clearly Helldivers 2 bugs preparing for a surprise attack

Stop me if you've heard one of these lines of propaganda before. Bugs can't fly. The Automatons haven't developed aerial gunships yet. There's no such thing as a heavy machine gun. These images from the surface of Mars are just "seasonal eruptions of carbon dioxide gas," not thousands of alien spiders gathering for an imminent attack on us, the good citizens of Super Earth.

Yeah, right.

Our colleagues over at Live Science and the esteemed members of the scientific community on whom...