Hawk Tuah Takes Long Island

“Where’s Hawk Tuah?” squeals a boy straddling his bicycle outside a sports bar called the Ugly Duckling in Long Beach, Long Island. He’s got a buzz-cut and three friends with him, and they say they’re in the eighth grade, although they seem much younger to me. They’re begging a burly bouncer to let them inside the bar because they want to meet the most famous woman on the internet this summer, Haliey Welch. “She’s not getting here till past your bedtime,” says the bouncer...