Mariners Exit Interviews 2019: The World Series Champions

[checks LinkedIn] so it says here you...won the world series?

What does it mean to be a champion?

Is it coming up with the Mariners, instantly becoming a fan favorite by unleashing a godly curveball, and being generally lovable? No.

Is it signing with the Mariners as a free agent, riding their coattails across the Pacific, injuring yourself, and ending your Seattle career with more innings in Japan than in America? Also no.

Unfortunately...